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R.E.flections by a chaliceD.R.E.amer
     Wed 17 Mar 2010 1:55pm
Whew, what a month this has been! I write often that working with youth consistently opens my mind and heart to new perspectives and possibilities. This month has gone even further and transformed me forever!

Mid-February, nine members of the Youth Group, Valerie, and I traveled to New York City for a social justice trip to learn about and work with the homeless community. Yes, there are plenty of homeless people right here in Boston, but New York City is home to the very special Youth Service Opportunities Project that offers an amazing program educating teens and adults about the homeless community. With real-life stories from people who are homeless and hands-on experiences working in shelters and soup kitchens, YSOP squashed stereotypes and opened our understandings of homelessness.

Hearing stories of transformation from Watertown teens who did the same trip, I expected I would feel inspired and grateful when I came home. How can meeting people who don’t have a home to live in or decent food to eat not leave me feeling grateful for not having to worry about having such essentials in my life? But my real transformation was so much deeper and complex. When the only public bathroom we found on our return trip from the shelter was disgusting and then we heard that the church hosting a soup kitchen locked all the bathroom doors, it sparked a harsh reality check of wondering where homeless people living on the streets go to the bathroom. This is but one of many mindless daily privileges we have that some homeless people suffer without.

As this Connector goes to press, I am preparing to do a “Cardboard City: homelessness awareness overnight project” with our Youth Group in the pouring rain. Going without a comfortable bed to sleep in and limited food was the primary focus of this project to get a tiny sense of what it must feel like to go without. Sure, this doesn’t bring us anywhere near truly understanding what it is like to be homeless because we know that after our experience that we get to go home to a warm bed and delicious food. But it is making us realize that there is so much more that homeless people suffer without than we ever think about. No access to modern day conveniences like transportation and kitchens, or even umbrellas for the least fortunate. Even the ones lucky enough to find overnight shelter still have to spend the days outside. No rain or snow days … always stuck outside fending for themselves … alone.

We discovered that a big loss for homeless people is respect and dignity. Over and over, we heard that homeless people are ignored and treated like they are invisible. It’s true.  How many times have I turned my head the other way to avoid looking at a homeless person because I didn’t want to give him money? And now I know that treating people like that is far worse than not giving them money. This message was so significant that I tried it when I returned home. I was in Cambridge one day and a homeless man was walking around the cars stopped at a traffic light with a cup and a sign asking for money. I felt shy, but rolled down my window and said, “I’m sorry I can’t help you, but I wanted to wish you good luck in getting your needs met today.” The look on the man’s face was pleasant surprise. He smiled at me and said, “Thank you, God bless you!” For me, it was a very small and simple act of kindness. For him, it was so much more!

I wonder if lack of respect and recognition is something that many people from minority groups suffer? I know that when I worked with disabled adults that they are often ignored as well. A disabled man in his wheelchair goes to get a coffee at Dunkin Donuts and everyone avoids looking at him. He doesn’t need anyone’s help. But a smile or hello would work miracles for his spirit!

As Unitarian Universalists, we proclaim the worth and dignity of all people as our first principle. I am now realizing that the first place to start could be simply saying “hello” to everyone we meet, no matter how different they seem from us. Sometimes, the people who seem the most different from us need our respectful recognition the most!

Roberta ♥
 

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